MRI Scans

During my routine medical screening I had a full body scan using MRI, its a huge machine that make images of what you would look like if you sat on a bread loaf slicing machine and your foot accidentally hit the ON button.

You are a sausage in huge white elongated donuts. It was obviously designed by someone who never heard of the word claustrophobia.

Despite ear plugs and headphones, you hear strange rhythmic pulsating tones, the sort of thing you would experience if you ever wake up after being blinded by a light, and found yourself locked in a green goo filled room just above the UFO main source of energy.

The give away that something was up, I was inching along the conveyor belt, when it came to my head it stopped, I was pulled back and the head scanned again. There was a long enough period of silence for me to start wondering if everyone has legged it because of a fire and left me in this giant bog roll?

I was told via the ear phones they would like to do additional tests and I needed to give consent to inject dyes in my blood stream, and this will cost an extra 800 bucks. One half of me was looking for a mirror to see if I have SUCKER tattooed across my forehead, what person in that situation would say nope, no need, get me out of this fire death trap I rather spend the dosh on a new set of titanium Callaway golf clubs. It was the other half that reluctantly agreed to the extra cost

The sudden lack of eye contact and the replies “we are just technicians and cant read scans” said it all.

The biggest giveaway on the second round of scans, they played lift music in my earphone.

Oh the irony, my first ever attempt at blogging I write "Like life who know where it will go" what was suppose to be just a general rant and ramble, all seem to be focusing on me standing at the crossroad of my anatomical journey.

Writing about too much soya sauce on the char shui pows at Mr.Wongs seems a bit irrelevant, but who knows latter this whole thing might be the catalyst to really appreciate simple things, like being half asleep and finding the cool patch on your pillow in the middle of a hot night.

Have to think of the new name for the blog, The green mile, Dead man walking, The short plank, or cheesy one for those happy clappers who believe in the bearded David Blaine of the middle east how about “ @ONE ” ?